


The Return

by dichelangelo



Category: Naruto
Genre: Blank Period, Canon Compliant, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Humor, Post-Canon, Romance, Sexual Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:47:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28257147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dichelangelo/pseuds/dichelangelo
Summary: Sasuke and Sakura return to Konoha after their year of travels. A welcome party is ready to greet them. The catch? They didn't inform any of their friends or family about their newborn daughter. This is what happens at the gates of Konoha. Surprise, joy, and everyone teasing Sasuke about his sex life.
Relationships: Haruno Sakura/Uchiha Sasuke, Hyuuga Hinata/Uzumaki Naruto, Sai/Yamanaka Ino
Comments: 17
Kudos: 165





	The Return

"Are you sure about this? We could always sneak around through the side." Sakura said in a gentle voice to her uneasy travel companion. 

Throughout their journey Sakura had learned to read Sasuke's mood. This morning he had awoken with a rigid posture, indicating that he hadn't slept well because something was bothering him. She noticed every hour how his neck muscles flexed as if on the verge of snapping like elastic stretched to tight. Finally there was the constant sinking of his cheeks as he bit at the inside of his mouth. 

Sasuke was nervous. Although she knew he would never admit to such a feeling out loud. She paused to look at him, her eyes wide and filled with endless patience for the man beside her. 

Sasuke let out an uncharacteristically long sigh. "Let's just get this over with." He said, before continuing to walk alongside Sakura and the newest little Uchiha resting in her arms towards the open gates of Konoha. 

\---

In the distance a line up of familiar figures awaited Sasuke and Sakura's return. 

"Oi!!!" A particularly eager blonde shouted. 

"I doubt they can hear you Naruto. They're still about 200 yards out." Kakashi said as he leisurely flipped through his worn book without sparing a glance at the approaching couple.

"How can you be so nonchalant Kakashi?! We haven't seen them in a whole year!" Naruto shouted back at his mentor. 

"Sasuke has been away for longer periods of time." Sai said quietly from nearby with his ever impassive smile. He stood next to another eager blonde who violently tapped her foot while glaring into the distance. 

"But Sakura hasn't!" Ino shouted. "I haven't even received a single letter from her since she left. Can you believe that girl? Does she have any idea how worried I've been!? And now, she has the audacity to take her leisurely time in approaching. How dare she make us wait in this heat! Ugh!" Ino threw her arms up angrily and continued pacing. 

The sudden gesture caught the attention of the smallest member of the line-up. A small cry came from a bundle nestled in the arms of Naruto's beloved. Hinata looked down at her ruffled newborn. She gently rocked baby Boruto while cooing him back into a gentle slumber. 

"Oh no, I'm so sorry Hinata…" Ino said quietly while looking over the shoulder of the young mother. 

"It's okay Ino. He's already back to sleep. See?" Hinata said with a warm and reassuring smile. 

"Awww, what a little angel. He's so sweet, just like his mama." Ino said with a saccharine voice reserved only for baby talk. "Nothing at all like his spastic father." She glanced up at Naruto who was waving both arms like a hummingbird.

"Excuse me?!" Naruto paused his flaps to shout back in offense. "Says the woman who disturbed my poor child in the first place!"

"You want to fight whiskers?!" Ino shouted in challenge.

A flurry of insults were exchanged between the blondes. Hinata tried to mediate but found herself shielding her young one from the worst of their vitriol. Kakashi continued flipping through his book, not sparing a glance at the ensuing drama. The only one who noticed the nearing couple was a certain artist. 

"Huh. Ugly is holding a baby." Sai said, nonchalantly.

"What did you just call my wife?!" Naruto shouted from within the headlock Ino had him trapped. 

"He wasn't referring to _your_ wife." A familiar woman's voice grumbled in annoyance. "Even after all of these years you just can't let that nickname go, shannaro..." Sakura sighed. 

"Replacement." Sasuke said, acknowledging Sai. 

"Traitor." Sai said back with a smile. 

A book thumped shut. "So good to have team 7 back together again, ne?" Kakashi stepped forward to greet his long awaited pupils. "Yo! Welcome home. And what do we have here…?" Kakashi was the only one who stepped forward. He leaned in with a single finger to play with the tiny hand that reached up to grab him. 

Everyone else was stunned into silence as all eyes fell upon the small bundle cradled in Sakura's arms. 

"O-oi…w-what's that?..." Naruto said with great effort. 

"That!? _She_ is my baby and _She_ has a name you know." Sakura so easily fell back into her routine with Naruto, already scolding him for a tactless remark. 

"Oh…and who's the father?" Naruto asked.

Sakura's face contorted in anger as she shouted even louder this time, "Who do you think!?--" Before she could further admonish Naruto, Sasuke's dark figure stepped forward, grabbing Naruto by the collar. 

"You wanna fight me idiot?" Sasuke said in a dark tone with a flash of red punctuating his threat.

"Hey, It's a valid question! How was I supposed to know you were even capable of reproducing!? Aren't you like flat down there or something? It's beyond me how you even managed to--!" 

"He had sex with Sakura." Added Sai to help clarify any confusion on the matter. 

Everyone froze. 

Sasuke's eyebrow flinched. His headache pulsed harder against his skull. This was going about as well as he had anticipated, which was to say, awful. Meanwhile he looked over to see that Sakura's face was now redder than his activated sharingan. He sighed, for not the first, nor what would be the last time today. 

Sai continued by saying, "I figured you of all people would understand the mechanics of sexual reproduction Naruto. Maybe I overestimated you dickless."

Naruto shouted in retort, "What's that?! Of course I'm VERY familiar with the mechanics! Definitely more familiar than the bastard!" Now Hinata joined Sakura in blushing furiously.

"You're really pissing me off." Sasuke squeezed the bridge of his nose considering the option of just teleporting out of this whole situation with his wife and child in tow.

"I'm the one who's pissed! You waltz in here and steal my thunder with your…your…BABY! But I'm the one who was supposed to surprise you with the baby, not the other way around! Why are you always copying me!"

"What the hell are you going on about dead last?" Sasuke said through tight teeth and a narrowed gaze.

From behind Naruto's back the white eyed heiress of the Hyuuga clan took that as her cue to step forward. In her arms was a little tuft of blonde hair atop a sleeping newborn. Sasuke paused, eyes widening, and mouth falling slightly agape, realization finally dawning on him.

A gasp came from behind Sasuke as a pink streak flashed past him to meet Hinata. "No way!! Hinata you too?! How old is your baby?!"

"T-two months." She said shyly. 

"Amazing! Sarada is the same age. I can't believe it. We must have been pregnant at the same time!" Sakura said. 

Naruto and Sasuke shared a pointed look and as if sharing a single brain cell, simultaneously said,

"March 31." 

"March 27! Hah!!" Naruto pumped his fist in victory. "Yes! I win!"

"Are you really turning the birth of your own children into a competition?" Asked Sakura through an exasperated sigh. How could she possibly forget how these two got when they spent any amount of time together? Some things never changed. Of course, she wasn't exactly any better when it came to her own bestfriend… 

"Forehead!!" Ino roughly shoved past Naruto and Sai, "How could you keep my precious niece a secret for so long! Do I mean so little to you?! Not a single letter, or…Oh! Look at her, she is so precious…" Ino said as tears pricked her eyes.

"P-Pig…are you crying?" Sakura asked in disbelief. 

"She has been emotional like this ever since she heard you were returning." Sai said.

"I have not!!" Ino sniffled while wiping at her eyes. "I'm just so happy for you…! My niece is beautiful. May I?" Ino reached her arms out and Sakura complied by placing her daughter in the Yamanaka's arms. Sakura silently observed her friend easily slip into a nurturing role, showering Sarada in praises and affirmations. She was already a loving aunt but somehow Sakura thought motherhood suited her friend…which triggered a suspicion in the astute medical nin.

Sakura tiptoed close to Sasuke and whispered for only him to hear. "Anata, is Ino…?" 

Sasuke glanced at the Yamanaka, his eyes lazily swirling before confirming with his wife, "Ah. She is." 

Sakura's face lit up, "Really!? I suppose what Tsunade said is true, babies always follow after war." She laughed remembering her master's warning. "Ino and I will have to talk in private later." She smiled from afar excited to share the good news. 

"What will you and Ino be talking about?" Sai said, suddenly appearing beside the young couple. 

"God! Sai don't sneak up on people like that!" Sakura grabbed at her chest in startle. 

Sasuke maintained his typical stoic resignation. 

"Will you and Ino be discussing your sexual experiences, as friends are known to do?" Sai said and then turned to address Sasuke with his unchanging smile. 

Sasuke's stoic resignation broke and was replaced by an expression of pure horror.

"Sasuke, how was your sexual intercourse with Sakura? I assume it was agreeable enough to produce an heir--" Sai was interrupted by a solid chakra infused fist to his cheek, which sent him flying.

"IDIOT! What sort of a question is that?!" Sakura shouted. 

Sai coughed and weakly spoke, "…N-Naruto told me that…men form bonds of friendship…through discussion of their sexual conquests…" 

"What! N-no…I mean, I didn't mean it like that…!" Naruto stammered out before feeling an all-too-familiar fist make contact with his cheek, landing him next to Sai. Sakura's now freed hands were put to good use in schooling her teammates in a lesson on appropriate small talk among friends. 

"Now, now, everyone. We should respect Sakura and Sasuke's privacy." Said Kakashi resolutely. 

_Finally, the voice of reason,_ Sasuke thought. Kakashi was putting an end to this foolish discussion. 

Kakashi continued saying, "Afterall, Sasuke's made it very clear in the past that he's not one to _play at romance_. Least of all would he do any sort of _playing_ in the company of a bright-eyed and eager young kunoichi over 9 months ago during his birthday--"

"We’re leaving." Sasuke announced while going to scoop up his daughter from the fawning Yamanaka. He walked ahead through the gates. Kakashi was the only one who caught a glimpse of the Uchiha's ears, which were dusted a shade of red as he skulked away. Sakura innocently looked up and trotted after her husband, leaving the heaps of Naruto and Sai battered, bloodied, and bruised on the ground. 

"Thanks for greeting us everyone! We'll talk soon!" Sakura called back to her friends with a friendly wave, before disappearing after Sasuke into the busy streets of Konoha. 

\---

Sakura downed a glass of water. "Cha! I always get so thirsty after feeding her." She looked down at the well fed baby nuzzled against her bare breast. She slowly eased the little one into the crib of the furnished nursery. Kakashi had generously put the young family up in a small apartment while their permanent home underwent its final renovations. Furnishings were included in this quaint apartment that felt like luxury living after the weeks they'd spent on the forest floor. This apartment was perfect for the pair of tired young parents seeking rest after their long and weary travels with a newborn.

Sakura stepped out into the living room to see Sasuke laying on the couch with eyes unmoving from the ceiling. She settled in next to him. 

"Seeing everyone earlier wasn't so bad, right?" She said leaning into her husband.

"Tch, were we at the same reunion?" He asked glancing down at her. 

"Sure, Sai and Naruto were idiots--" She said.

Sasuke interrupted and added, "Kakashi too."

"--Yes, Kakashi too. But I think all things considered it went over well." She smiled and nestled herself further into his lap. He let her, just like he would always let her do what she wants. In this way he vowed to atone for how he treated her in their youth. 

"Hn. I suppose the worst is behind us." He said and relaxed into her embrace, breathing in the scent of her freshly washed hair.

Sakura burst out with a laugh that lasted a little too long for comfort. Sasuke looked down at her with a confused expression and awaited an explanation. She blinked up at him. Reality hit her and she quickly pulled back.

"Oh...you weren't joking? Anata, those were just our friends. Tomorrow is when we'll have to face the most ruthless and unflinching critic who will challenge, scrutinize, and judge all aspects of our very personhood without a trace of compassion." Sakura said with true worry knitted in her brows.

"And who's that…?" Sasuke asked.

"Mebuki Haruno."


End file.
